dimarts, 5 de maig de 2015

PILLS TO PURGE MELANCHOLY Strange quarrels had past, 'Twixt the first and the last, And many Tongue combats had been, For the Youngest well knew, 'Twas her Sister that Blew, The late Blast as she stood by the Queen; With a hum, &c. But letting that go, Since Winds pass too and fro, As Fate soon the Case made plain, By a Visit they made, To a haughty Court Jade, Who a Page had to hold up her Train ; With a hum, &c. Who when at her Gate, She the Sisters had met, Bowing low with her back-bone crump, As she gave a Salute, Tother stooping to do't, Gave a proof she was loose in her Rump \ By a hum, &c. Which unfortunate noise, Made her Sister rejoyce, And as nothing more pleasing could come, With a laugh screw'd so high, She was ready to die, As she follow'd her into the Room ; With a hum, &c. But oh, dismal lot, Her own Case she forgot, For just as a filly Foal pisses, When she romping does pass, O'er the gay springing grass, So the Room was Embroyder'd with S S. And a whisse, hum, &c. Songs Compleat, Pleasant and Divertive, &c. A Mad Song. By a Lady distracted with Love. Sung in one of my Comedies of Don Quixote : The Notes to it done by the late famous Mr. Henry Purcell ; which, by reason of their great Length, are not Printed in this Book, but may be found at the Musick Booksellers singly, or in his Or- pheus Brittannicus ; pei'forming in the Ttme all the Degrees of Madness. ******* <*■ Rom * {Sullenly Mad.] rosie Bowers, where sleeps the God of Love, Hither, ye little waiting Cupids, fly, fly, fly, ******** H^her, ye little waiting Cupids, fly. Teach me in soft melodious Strains to move In tender Passion my Heart's darling Joy. Ah, let the Soul of Musick tune my Voice, To win dear Strephon, who my soul enjoys Pleasant and Diver live. Wild, thro' the Woods I'll fly, I'll fly, Robes, Locks — shall thus — be tore ; A thousand, thousand Deaths I'll Dye, E'er thus, thus, in vain — e'er thus in vain adore .

Or if more influencing,
  Is to be Brisk and Airy ;
  With a Step and a Bound,
  And a Frisk from the Ground,
  I'll trip like any Fairy.
  As once an Ida dancing
  Were three Coelestial Bodies,
  With an Air, and a Face,
  And a Shape, and a Grace,
  I'll charm, like Beauties Goddess,
  \_Melancholly Madness \\
  Ah, 'tis in vain, 'tis all, 'tis all in vain ; \
  Death and Despair must end the fatal Pain : >
  Cold, cold Despair, disguis'd like Snow and Rain, J
  Falls on my Breast, bleak Winds in Tempests blow,
  My Veins all shiver, and my Fingers glow ;
  My Pulse beats a dead March, for lost Repose,
  And to a solid lump of Ice my poor fond Heart is froze.
  {Fantastically Mad.~\
  Or, say ye Powers, my Peace to crown,
  Shall I thaw my self, and drown
  Amongst the foaming Billows ;
  Increasing, all with Tears I shed
  On Beds of Ooze, and Chrystal Pillows.
  Lay down, lay down my lovesick Head.
  Say, say, ye Powers, my Peace to crown,
  Shall I, shall I thaw myself, and drown ?
  [Stark Mad.]
  No, no, no, no, I'll straight run mad,
  Mad, mad, mad, mad, that soon my Heart will warm ;
  Whene'er the Sense is fled, is fled,
  Love has no Power, no Power to charm.
And folks of each rank and Station,
  Had thither free recourse,
  From the Keeper of the Purse,
  To the Mayor of a Corporation ;
  With a hum, &c.
  When at Noon as in State
  The Queen was at Meat,
  And the Princely Dane sat by Her,
  A Fart there was hear'd,
  That the Company scar'd,
  As a Gun at their Ears had been fir'd ;
  With a hum, &c.
  Which Irreverent Sound
  Made 'em stare all around,
  And in each Countenance lower,
  Whilst judgment thereupon
  Said, it needs must be done,
  As afronting the Soveraign pow'r ;
  With a hum, &c.
  The Chaplain in place
  Had but just said Grace,
  And then cringing behind withdrawn,
  When they call'd back,
  To examine if the Crack,
  Came from him or the Lords in Lawn,
  With a hum, &c.
  For just by the Chair,
  Some fat Bishops were there,
  Whom the Whigg boys fain would bespatter,
  Who with a Sober look,
  Declar'd upon the Book,
  That the Clergy knew nought of the matter ;
  Of the hum, &c.
  Butthey would not swear,
  For the Parties were there,
  Of the High Church and the Low,
  Who from a mighty Zeal,
  For good o' th' commonweal
  Might let some of their Bagpipes blow ;
  With a hum, &c.
  At this when heard,
  Late Comptroler strokt his Beard,
  And declar'd with an Antique bow,
  He tho' of some nothing knew,
  Yet he would vouch for two,
  Himself, and his Brother yohn How ;
  For the hum, &c.
  For the Squire was well bred,
  And his Key might have had,
  But refus'd for an old State Trick,
  And that he that had made Sport,
  With Places of the Court,
  Now resolv'd upon Wharton's white stick ;
  With a hum, &c.
  When this was done,
  And the Crime not yet known,
  Came a Law Peer to plead the Case,
  How they had no intent,
  To affront the Government
  Nor had he to regain the Mace ;
  With a hum, &c.
  A Garter and Star,
  Next censure did bear,
  Who for all he lookt so high,
  And carry 'd it so great,
  In Intrigues of the State,
  Yet might condescend to let fly
  A hum, &c.
  But he, in a heat,
  Said the thing in debate,
  Impos'd on Each sex might be,
  And would have made it clear,
  That some Dutchesses there,
  Were as likely to do't as he ;
  With a hum, &c.
  The Colour then rose,
  'Mongst the noble Furbelows,
  Of Honour, and most too, Wives,
  Who declar'd upon their rep,
  They ne'er made such a 'scape,
  Nor e'er did such a thing in their lives
  As a hum, &c.
  But the Gigling rout,
  That were waiting round about,
  'Twas likely were heedless Jades,
  So that saving their own fame
  They agreed upon the sham,
  To have turn'd it upon the poor Maids ;
  With a hum, &c.
  Who all drown'd in Tears,
  Charg'd the Ladys there in years,
  To tell truth if that hideous rore,
  So Thunder-like sent,
  From Audacious Fundament,
  Could consist with their Virgin bore ;
  With a hum, &c.
  Who answering no,
  All disputes fell too,
  For now they believ'd it was reason,
  To pass the matter of,
  As a Joke, and in a Laugh,
  Since they ne'er could make it High Treason ;
  With a hum, &c.
  So that turning the Jest,
  They agreed it at last,
  That nought from the Presence did come,
  But the noise that they heard,
  Was some Yeoman o' the Guard,
  That brought Dishes into the next Room ;
  With a hum, &c.
  But the truth of the sound
  Not at all could be found,
  Since none but the doer could tell,
  So that hushing up the Shame,
  The Beef-eater bore the blame,
  And the Queen, God be prais'd, din'd well ;
  With a hum, hum, hum, hum.
  The Second Part of the Fart ;
  Or the Beef-eaters Appeal to Mr. Z?'Urfey.
  [To the same Tune.]
  YE Peers that in State,
  Now with Commons are met,
  To right both the Weak and the Strong,
  Prepare to redress
  A poor Beef-eater's Case,
  Who has had a most damnable wrong ;
  By a hum, &c.
  Strange Jarring I know,
  'Twixt the High- Church and Low,
  Does your dear valu'd hours ingross,
  Yet mine is such a case,
  That I beg it may take place,
  As soon as the Speaker is chose,
  With a hum, &c.
  For tho' I'm no Lord,
  Nor to Senate preferr'd,
  Yet my Priviledge I'll maintain,
  And as free-born of the Land,
  You my wrong shall understand,
  Which I here will undaunted explain ;
  Of a hum, &c.
  The Fart you late heard,
  Laid to one of the Guard,
  That of late did the Court Surprise,
  'Tis prov'd was not his,
  As Informers did guess,
  But a Females of his Jolly size ;
  With a hum, &c.
  The thing came out thus,
  Near to Buckingha?n House,
  And the Motto all Fancies excelling,
  Near the Ancient Pall-mall,
  The Park, and Canal,
  Two Buxom young Ladies were dwelling ;
  With a hum, &c.
  Related so near,
  It does plainly appear,
  That they both from one Bottom did come,
  The one thin and lean,
  As a Garden French Bean,
  And the tother as round as a Drum ;
  With a hum, &c.
  The Elder when dress'd,
  And her Belly straight lac'd,
  If she stoop'd from behind must Roar,
  The Younger as frail,
  If she laugh'd at any Tale,
  Could not keep in the yuices before ;
  With a whisse, hum, &c.

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