American tourist family mistaken for spies takes refuge in local American embassy, which is temporarily under the direction of the ambassador's inept son. Mayhem ensues. Woody Allen before the angst.
I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.”
“In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out
dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old people's
home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy,
go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold
watch and a party on your first day. You work for 40 years until you're
young enough to enjoy your retirement. You party, drink alcohol, and are
generally promiscuous, then you are ready for high school. You then go
to primary school, you become a kid, you play. You have no
responsibilities, you become a baby until you are born. And then you
spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa-like conditions with
central heating and room service on tap, larger quarters every day and
then Voila! You finish off as an orgasm!”
I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable.” Is sex dirty? Only when it's being done right.”
“God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.”
“If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.”
“My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.”
“Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they fall in love with.”